Dumb crook…no, wait. Make that “Dumb cop/crook”

The Australian
A Victorian policeman already suspended from the force allegedly tried to rob a milk bar with a fake gun. Ethical Standards detectives are investigating after the 35-year-old officer was arrested last night in Melbournes east.

Police allege the officer tried to rob a milk bar in Mont Albert North last night with an imitation pistol, entering the shop and demanding cash.

The milk bar owner handed him the till tray before realising the gun was a fake, then hit him over the head with a metal object, police said.

Police arrested the officer, who was taken to hospital with head injuries.

The right to keep and bear arms has limits apparently.

rocket launcher
A 31-year-old man was arrested Tuesday by federal agents and sheriff’s officials acting on a tip that the convicted burglar had a rocket launcher.

Paul Henry Ledwik was arrested without incident on a felon in possession of firearms warrant…

New baby at the New York Aquarium

Link

The cutest mustachioed baby in this town is definitely the new walrus at the New York Aquarium. The baby walrus, who was born on June 12 and weighed in at 115 pounds, is ready for his public, as he made his first appearance yesterday.

Think you play a pretty good game of golf?

Third hole-in-one

A Suffolk [UK] golfer, David Huggins, has just hit his third hole-in-one while playing in a junior tournament. Remarkable but even more so when you realize he is just eight years old…and hit his first hole-in-one at age four.

His dad celebrated by buying sodas for all the other junior competitors in the tournament.

P.S. Tiger Woods got his first hole in one at age six.

Need a toilet for your Cessna? How about one from Concorde?

BBC NEWS | UK

A four-day auction of spare Concorde parts has begun in Toulouse, south west France. The auction is to raise funds for an aeronautical museum for the French city, with the centrepiece one of the two supersonic jets it owns.

Items on sale include a 1.2 ton landing gear, a Mach-monitoring speedometer and a windshield.

………………

And a toilet

Naked Ambition (or) The Bare Facts Candidate

More at San Francisco – News

During one five-week stretch this summer, George Davis was arrested four times while campaigning to become mayor of San Francisco. In fact, the click of the cuffs became so commonplace that Davis penned a curt letter to Mayor Gavin Newsom requesting a reprieve. And ever since then, he hasn’t been arrested once.

Of course, ever since then he’s started wearing clothes while campaigning.

Association prez says Austrian court is just monkeying around

More at Court

He’s now got a human name — Matthew Hiasl Pan — but he’s having trouble getting his day in court. Animal rights activists campaigning to get Pan, a 26-year-old chimpanzee, legally declared a person vowed Thursday to take their challenge to Austria’s Supreme Court after a lower court threw out their latest appeal.

A provincial judge in the city of Wiener Neustadt dismissed the case earlier this week, ruling that the Vienna-based Association Against Animal Factories had no legal standing to argue on the chimps behalf. The association, which worries the shelter caring for the chimp might close, has been pressing to get Pan declared a “person” so a guardian can be appointed to look out for his interests and provide him with a home.

It’s all chalk and paint

Link to more pictures

You can’t go naked on Mount Everest

More here: Nudity ban

Mountaineering authorities in Nepal want to ban nudity and ‘obscene record’ bids on Mount Everest.

A Nepali climber claimed the world’s highest display of nudity on the world’s highest mountain last year. He disrobed for several minutes on the 29,035 ft summit in temperatures about -10C, reports Metro.

“There should be strict regulations to discourage such attempts by climbers,” said Ang Tshering, president of Nepal Mountaineering Association.

Home is where the bike is…stolen

More here: Bike stolen
A cyclist pedalled 5,000 miles across the world – only to have his bike stolen when he got back home to Barnsley.

Lee Simmons’ bike survived bandits and being left unlocked in slums, reports The Sun. But it was taken by thieves who broke into his dad’s garage back home in South Yorkshire.

You can’t make this stuff up

More (and picture) at the Daily Mail

As the hostess of a dinner party, Susannah Kendrick was already fully stretched keeping her guests entertained and the kitchen situation under control. But she then proceeded to give an entirely new meaning to multi-tasking.

The 29-year-old teacher – who was eight-and-a-half months pregnant – had already served the starters. Then, as she prepared to present the main course – a home-made lamb curry – she felt her first contraction.

And just eight minutes later, after three pushes, little Trinity was born weighing 6lb 1oz.

But Mrs Kendrick hadn’t forgotten her duties as a hostess. As she was taken to hospital as a precaution, she yelled: “The rhubarb crumble’s in the fridge!”

………………………

The headline from the Daily Mail: Dinner party hostess gives birth between courses and cries: ‘The rhubarb crumble’s in the fridge!’

First you get a really big pumpkin…

Then you hollow it out, sit in it and paddle like crazy. Or at least you do if you want to compete in the pumpkin canoe race at the German Pumpkin Festival.

Crime tip: Obey the traffic laws, idiot.

Seattle Times Newspaper

Driving 11 miles over the speed limit cost one driver more than a quarter-million dollars this weekend — at least for now.

A State Patrol trooper spotted a Honda Accord speeding southbound on Interstate 5 [near Seattle] on Friday, according to State Patrol spokesman Jeff Merrill. It was raining, and the driver was cruising down the freeway at 71 mph. So the trooper pulled the driver over, Merrill said.

The 35-year-old from British Columbia, who had a valid driver’s license, struggled to tell the trooper where he was going and how long he had been in Washington, prompting the trooper to search his car, Merrill said. The trooper found two suitcases in the trunk — one filled with $276,640 in cash. The driver claimed he won the stacks of dollar bills at 23 casinos in Washington, California and Nevada, but he was unable to produce any receipts, according to Merrill.

The money was confiscated as the State Patrol investigates the incident. Merrill said if it is determined the man obtained the money legally it will be returned to him.

……………

Dollar bills? Casinos paid him over a quarter million in dollar bills? I don’t think so. Can you spell “courier”, boys and girls?

Baboon Goons

WCAU | Philadelphia

A criminal gang being blamed for countless burglaries, thefts and vandalism in South Africa is made up entirely of baboons. Residents of Cape Peninsula said the gang is at least 350 baboons strong.

The reason there’s so many is that they are the country’s last colony of coastal baboons and are a protected species.

The creatures have learned to break into houses and to open car doors. Once inside a home, they generally head straight for the refrigerator where they take what they want and leave behind a big mess.

Ananova – Couple’s naked ambition

Naked ambition

A Bedfordshire couple are braving the elements by attempting to climb nearly 300 mountains – naked. The naturists, known only as Stuart and Karla, want to reach the peak of Scotland’s 284 Munros, which are mountains more than 3,000ft high.

So far, they have conquered 15 and keep a record of their progress – complete with photos of them naked and cold – on website www.nakedmunros.com.

Become famous overnight! Vomit live on air!

vomits live on air

A Swedish television presenter has become a hit on YouTube after she vomited live on air but continued with the show. So far, nearly 250,000 people have watched Eva Nazemson’s display of professionalism on the video sharing site.

Nazemson was hosting a late night phone-in game show on TV4 Plus when she suddenly become ill, reports Metro.

As a male caller tried to solve a word puzzle, Nazemson quickly turned her head to one side and vomited. She disappeared off screen for a few seconds but quickly reappeared to continue with the phone-in.

The yellow windbreaker probably wasn’t a good idea…

convict at police party

An escaped convict has been recaptured in Taiwan – at a barbecue party organised at the local police station.

Police in Xinzhu city invited residents to celebrate the Moon Festival with them. But officers could not believe their eyes when they saw an escaped drug dealer called Chen, who had just been listed as one of the citys most wanted criminals, at the party.

Police officer Cai Zhengtong, who was in charge of the barbecue, said: “I saw a man dressed in an eye-catching yellow windbreaker enter the place and sit in the corner. He was enjoying the barbecue with the others. I really couldn’t believe my eyes, since the man was just the criminal we were seeking.”

Police at the party quickly arrested Chen. He told officers he thought it would have been the last place police would have thought of looking for him.

Angry with someone? Sit down and think about the problem.

Thanks, Paula.

Floor it, Zeke!!

in a tractor?

A [UK] farmer’s son who was being chased by police tried to outrun the officers’ car – in a tractor. Drunken Thomas Kirkham refused to stop the tractor, which was pulling a plough, despite police pursuing him with flashing blue lights and twice pulling alongside him ordering him to stop, a court heard.The pursuit, along roads in Tyldesley, ended with Kirkham driving the tractor off-road by smashing through a fence and into a field. Police eventually had to spray CS gas in his face to get him out of the tractor

A natural mistake. Pickles look a lot like Anthrax.

Oddly Enough | ReutersA Malaysian diplomat has apologized to the Iraqi government after he mistook a box of sweet pickles sent to him as Ramadan gift for anthrax powder, a newspaper said on Saturday…He had received the gift sent to his office on September 13. When he opened the box at his house later that day he only saw white powder. Fearing it might be anthrax powder, he placed the parcel outside his house and called the police. When police examined the parcel the next day, they found it contained only sweet pickles. The powder was sugar sprinkled on top to preserve them, the newspaper said.