Oldster's View

Fight Against Maturity

How not to rob a bank in Germany…or anywhere else

1. Get Drunk.

2. Pull a stocking over your head.

3. Arm yourself with a water pistol and a potato peeler.

4. Enter the bank, wave the potato peeler over your head.

5. Demand money.

6. Leave when a teller explains to you that they have run out of money.

7. Leave the stocking on your head so that the police can arrest you five minutes later.

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August 16, 2007 Posted by | Dumb Crook | Comments Off on How not to rob a bank in Germany…or anywhere else

What’s this man talking about?

Link to Video

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Tipped by Oldster Space Consultant For Internal Affairs, Knight Rider.

August 16, 2007 Posted by | cool stuff, NASA | 1 Comment

At least he didn’t eat the kid’s homework

Goat eats 10,000 Euros
A German farmer lost 10,000 Euros when it was eaten by his goat. But he got it back after having a vet carry out emergency surgery to recover the cash.

Martin Radlberger, 34, from Rosenheim in Germany left the 100 Euro notes that he planned to use to buy a tractor on the kitchen table when he went to answer the phone.

But when he returned he saw his nanny goat Steffi just finishing off the last crisp new note.

August 16, 2007 Posted by | animals | Comments Off on At least he didn’t eat the kid’s homework

Flat heads need not apply

Ananova
An elite kindergarten in China says it will take only ’round-headed’ students as they make the cleverest pupils.

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Li Junjie Educational Kindergarten, in Zhengzhou city, checks the shape of would-be pupils’ heads as part of admission tests. Owner Li Junjie insisted: “A round head indicates cleverness; a student with a flat head can never be outstanding no matter how hard he works.”

August 16, 2007 Posted by | Dumb Bureaucrats, People | Comments Off on Flat heads need not apply

Poe Mystery Visitor confesses…

More at US News

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For decades, a mysterious figure dressed in black, his features cloaked by a wide-brimmed hat and scarf, crept into a churchyard to lay three roses and a bottle of cognac at the grave of Edgar Allan Poe.

Now, a 92-year-old man who led the fight to preserve the historic site says the visitor was his creation.

“We did it, myself and my tour guides,” said Sam Porpora. “It was a promotional idea. We made it up, never dreaming it would go worldwide.”

August 16, 2007 Posted by | People, Strange | Comments Off on Poe Mystery Visitor confesses…

Mounties always get their man…er, beast…er, man

CBC
Mounties in eastern Manitoba have nabbed a strange, hairy monster that has been stalking campgrounds in and around the Whiteshell Provincial Park for the past two summers.

Police received the call around midnight on July 30 from a woman who had been startled by the beastly creature while camping at Pinawa, about 90 kilometres east of Winnipeg.

“This was further to about 10 calls we had last year of the same incident in the Whiteshell Provincial Park, so the members were aware of the type of person we were looking for,” Staff Sgt. Glen Reitlo told CBC News Wednesday. “A couple of our members attended and ended up finding the sasquatch.”

The creature turned out to be an 18-year-old Winnipeg man wearing a hairy gorilla mask, which Reitlo described as “ugly” and “scary.”

August 16, 2007 Posted by | People | Comments Off on Mounties always get their man…er, beast…er, man